Now WHO IS STUPID?
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As we neared the DZ and Marks made his jumpmaster check, he starts yelling at me I was last man in stick and couldn't understand him.
Finally he gets through to me telling me to take up a double bight in my static line and calls me stupid which I did not appreciate.
All of a sudden he has us unhook and tells us we have to push the jeep out of the tail. Naturally the airforce crew chief tell him it is not necessary that's why they have the drag chute on the pallet.
I felt much better since now I knew who was stupid. Out we went.
Later on when the rest of the troops jumped in a helmet lands about 20 feet from us scaring the bejesus out of all of us.
It was PFC Bob Johnston's from Ohio he lost it in the prop blast.
Lou Schreiner
THE LITTLE SAUERKRAUTS
I can say that my parents were from Germany.A well known truism where ever G.I.'s served they always made a hit with the kids. We were no exception.
Once a-s deep in snow me and Woof Whittle had to hang around while our gun jeep was being serviced by a field repair unit. Along trudges a little komrad, blond hair,blue eyes maybe 5 years old. Stops stares at Woof all goggle eyed (Woof was a black trooper) and Woof is cracking up. I engage the kid in my smattering of German and he says he never saw a black man. I tell Woof he is laughing so hard tears are in his eyes. We are about 3 kilometers from town, give the kid some coins of the realm for some wine. Comes back later we give him 5 marks, kid loves us.
Many times we would have kids go for beer,wine,bread, or wurst. No matter how big the bill always got the correct change and the kids always found the right guys who had sent them (some guys tried to bogart our stuff on occassion).
When I visited my relatives, I brought one ice cream every day. He was a 3rd cousin, three years old and also a mickey mouse doll. He thought I was a prince. Remember how expensive dairy products were? For years his mom told me he would clutch old mickey and wave at every G.I. passing through the town.
One time a 6 or 7 year old comes up to our position in his back yard. We show him how to use 106mm sight, traverse, our M-1's, 45,s,binoculars, etc. He goes in when mom calls, comes back out with a gallon jar of pickled string beans for us.
The kids were great and probably still remember G.I. Joe.
Lou Schreiner
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THE BIG SAUERKRAUTS
The krauts referred to us young troopers as America's Baby Faced Teenage Killers. Sure our guys would lay out a few krauts here and there, but usually they deserved it.
If a girl went with a soldier or hung out in a G.I. bar they were scorned by their peers. A lot of the older krauts resented us due to our fathers and older brothers winning the war. And of course it wasn't our men who did it it was always our supplies and terror bombers. Guess they forgot about Rotterdam, London,V-1's etc.
One lugerhead approached Jerry Ray one day looked at his BAR,says,"BAR nix gut ja?
Jerry says it was good enough to whip you. Kraut leaves.
While visiting relatives in uniform (at their request) my uncle former SS man is drunk asks und who are zee best soldaten in zee world? Answer U.S. Army Airborne. Wrong answer he slaps me in face, I leap over table at him, rolling around in potato salad, wurst beer and what ever else. They separate us he calms down, shows me big steamer trunk with his trusty mauser carbine , some stick grenades, a luger , a P-38 mauser pistol, his black uniform, complete withiron cross, assault badge,eastern front medal etc..
More to follow
Lou Schreiner
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MY SS UNCLES PHOTOS
Since he has now gone to hell where I feel he rightfully belongs as did his wife this tale can be told.
He whips out a series of photos from his glory days as he called them. First shows him and a squad or so of his SS pals, grinning and pointing their guns at two Frenchmen who had their hands tied behind their backs. Next shot they are menacing them with bayonets. Next they are against a wall, with rifles aimed at them. Next lying crumpled by wall. Next hanging from a tree. Next bodies on fire. He justfies this by saying they were given a drum head court martial and were maquis and deserved it.
His wife also dead now was in the female version of the Hitler Youth. Takes me to cemetary showing me all various relatives graves. Remember how neat they were. Just outside of cemetary wall is rude looking wooden crosses seven graves, partially concealed by brambles, tells me they were russian flyers who bailed out they had great fun pitchforking them to death. Bolsheviks don't get buried in hallowed ground.
Lou Schreiner
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SGT.JOE BAKER --OUTSTANDING NCO
As mentioned in a previous story, rank was hard to come by in the 504 since most of the replacements were E-4 and up, so we troopers were S.O.L.
Joe Baker was a speedy four out of the 101st Airborne Division, and he was an orphan. He took to soldiering like a man born to it. Joe was known as "Buns Baker". He got chosen to go to NCO school if memory serves me right was at Bad Toltz. He came in number 1 in all the catergories that the men were graded in. They cut special orders making him a buck sergeant
Naturally, wise guys like myself would ask can we still call you Joe? Is it permissible to call you,"Sergeant Buns?" Joe would laugh and give that crooked smile of his because he knew we respected him and never hesitated to follow his orders.
Once I was in the snack bar and for some reason no other troopers were there, I realized a bunch of legs 20 or so were giving me the evil eye (this was due to an incident from downtown). They were going to play catch up. Along comes newly promoted "Buns", gets a cup of java joins me at table. I tell him he better leave and explain why. Ask him to scare me up some reinforcements. Joe said, I'm your buddy and they aren't getting you without getting me. If I leave they may jump before the guys get here." We finished our coffee, departed getting the evil eye and assorted mutterings. Guess his stripes saved me a beating. Thanks again Joe.
Joe stayed in, went back to 101st and wrote me from Nam several times. He couldn't believe I was a cop.
If you see this Joe or anyone knows where he is, get in touch with me.
Lou Schreiner
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 Sgt.Joe Baker
OH JOY!DO YOU REMEMBER?
K.P. (doing the trays, peeling spuds, D.R.O.
All of the field duty (but it did make the time go and there was less chickenshit)
Getting drunk especially on wine at night going on a run in A.M. dying of thirst, drinking water and it causing you to get drunk all over for the rest of the day
Those monthly alerts, the organized confusion they would cause
That idiotic order of the gold patriots card required to be carried at all times
1 mark bottles of Rhine wine
Those great flip top bottles of beer
Getting inspected for guard duty by some newly coined Lt. and being asked for your points of performance in varied orders (fresh in his mind long forgotten by you
Chickenshit in general
I.G. inspections Believe I got us the only gig My winter green pants pegged at 14" Barnes going berserk, demanding them told him I threw them out Actually gave them to Poncho Gonzalez he gave me his they were only 16"
Good thing Barnes didn't nor the I.G. leg check my khakis they were all 14"
The cinderella passes
The coveted overnighters
Lou Schreiner
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JUMPING INTO DENMARK & RELATED STUFF
Prior to making that jump,due to the bad weather, there had been at least two weather delays. Don't remember the town nearest to where we jumped probably because we never saw it. Just manuevers.
It was the worst airplane ride I ever was on,from takeoff to landing turbulence was terrible. I was told later that we were hitting up and down drafts of as much as 500 feet. Just after hooking up, I swallowed my chewing tobacco and puked all the way down. Did that once in Bragg also on a jump when I was a machine gunner in 1/503.
Never was I so glad to get out of a plane. High winds caused a lot of us to drag along the ground just like a speeding bullet capewell releases or not. Also when I was about 500 feet up I located a scruffy looking tree on the ground when landed I was a good 3/4 of a mile away from it, which gives you a good idea of the wind velocity that day. Seem to recall that a young latino trooper not in our company was apparently knocked out, shroud lines around his neck and was choked to death. If I am wrong someone correct me. Do know about 6 guys in our company and quite a few in battlegroup would not jump. We rode them unmercifully before they were transferred but actually it was understandable, they were cherry jumpers, jump school, 30 day leave, then go on a jump like that.
The only Danes I saw were 6 of them and an antiquated tank built prior to WWII that we opened up on with blanks. Nato said how the Danes had repelled the airborne invasion.Yeah sure.
Recall the sun a red ball 24 hours a day low on the horizon, no one eating cause all they were feeding us was steamed veggies. Ugh no taste and a strange color.
Lou Schreiner
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WHO WAS THAT---PERHAPS ONE WAS I
The trooper whom I never met who had gone to Copenhagen, liked it so much even though he only had 6 months left to serve, stayed there. Guys would run into him. Hope you made out okay in the end. All of the troops who knew you always spoke highly of you.
Which trooper in England I believe got airborne wings tatooed on arm with the legend U.S. Pabatbooper (Intentional mistake?)
Which troopers went to London wandered off and wound up in a small English pub where at closing time the barkeep said Gentlmen charge your glasses. One Limey proposes a toast to the Queen. Young tipsy trooper says,"F- -k that old b- - - h" In the mad rush to leave (they had pubs in Soho to visit) quite a few Englishmen were injured.
Who with his buddies being ignored by waitresses in the Bavarian Brau Haus said,if I bit her on the a- s she'd serve us, for two cents I would." One trooper says I got 10 marks you wouldn't, several bets are made, trooper leaps through the air, bites her you know where;tremendous scream,fists bottles and krauts are flying as troopers exit.
Near Christmas the trooper who leapt onto the bar at the Copacabana, with a bag loaded with washers a few marks on top, flinging them into the air shouting, "I'm the DM daddy of Deutschland." Causing a mini riot among the girls, laughter by the troopers.
Lou Schreiner
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WITH THE JOLLY TROLLEY TROOPERS
Once upon a time in that land of doors that had cranks in lieu of real door knobs, I with a bunch of original 1/504 A.B.G. troopers chanced to be sitting on the curb in downtown Mainz. I was a bit nervous because I was new there my third or fourth day and had one of those genuine forged passes in my pocket. We were passing the time munching on those kraut version of the hot dog,(you remember them-a flat rectangular cardboard dish, a blob of mustard, a fat wurst, and a piece of bread,while swigging from our jugs of steinhager, cognac, and flip tops.
One trooper as the strassenbahn passed by said he always had wanted to drive one. I mentioned I liked to ride them as a kid in NY.A trooper suggests getting on the next one and asking if his buddy could drive. On we get,trooper politely makes his request, after a bunch of fericht amerikaners, etc. Trooper pops him one (I think the word schwienhund caused it). After numerous departures by the kraut passengers and false starts off we go at a high rate of speed. Somewhere along the way a trooper decides to be jumpmaster, up we stand, out we go. Many bumps, bruises and a broken arm. The driver stopped the streetcar and was annoyed that we had ruined his run and that he had to look after us clowns. How we got back to base only the lord knows and how we never got caught I don't know. We wanted to design special wings for that night but none of us was very artistic. A long time later Charlie "Stickman" Noel joined the unit and he was a great artist, however I was the only trolley trooper left so I never commissoned him for that project.
Lou Schreiner
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